With all the craze behind social networks these days, does it come as any surprise that one has sprung up for facial hair? Stache Passions is a free "online dating site specifically for singles with a passion for the mustache." In this network, users can browse the Mustache Groups to find members that rock a specific type of stache (and those that love them). There are even levels of so-called "experience" in this social network ranked as newbie, expert or Stache Groupie (we're not making this up).
Stache Passions "provides an open environment where mustache wearers can revel in the sitewide love bestowed upon them by a community of stache afficianados." Hmmm.... We're all in favor of supporting facial hair, but this seems more of a mockery than a social network we can get behind despite there being numerous women/transgenders looking for their future stached man.
Here are some of the more interesting members we came across as we explored this niche community:
- HairyDoyle - This man is currently "on a pirate ship with parents" and is looking for "dating, Mr. Right Now or a soul mate or the yin to his yang." This mustached gent supposedly (*cough* *bullshit* *cough*) makes $100,000+ and defines his individuality by stating "mullet, nudist, stache, undetectable toupee." (We have no idea what that means).
- ColonStache - "I am just a man who loves his lady tickler. Everyday I wake up and I comb it 27 times. Then, I get a shower, where I wash each individual strand of my lip sweater. Finally, I again comb my nose neighbor until it is just the way the ladies love it." He's "a pirate at heart and a psychic" (and obviously will die a virgin).
- ChopSuey - Not much to report on here, but let me offer a tip to the men out there.... do not, under any circumstances, state the following in the food category: "BRAINS!!!, Carnivore, Raw, Spicy!" as a way to attract a potential mate.
All-in-all, mustached men - and those seeking them - are much better off IRL and avoiding sites like these on the Open Web.
