Jeff Bridges

Boycott SNL! Beards of the World... UNITE!

Enough is enough... the beards are not to be messed with, and once pushed too far, we will come back thicker, darker and more rich with vigor (aka longer and uncut) than ever before! Billboards are one thing, but this 'shaving culture' that seems to be rearing it's ugly bald head during the last month of this year of our lord, the year of the beard, is disgusting... and feeding this shaved beast is ill advised, especially during Decembeard.

Our favorite goatee winner from last year's globes, THE dude, el Duderino himself (and the star of both “Tron: Legacy” and “True Grit”) will be hosting “Saturday Night Live” tonight... which was supposed to be a Christmas SNL to remember. Now it will be one we'll never forget... ever.

Our dear Jeff Bridges seems to have followed in the sad ways of Zach G. from last march, when the reTARD succumbed to corporate pressure and shaved during his hosting stint at SNL... well, we are calling BULLSHIT on this 'comedy show' that seems to be filled with writers seemingly unable (or worse yet, unwilling) to let their creative juices flow to write skits for furry faces... FOR SHAME we say.

Just like the dreaded NY Yankees are known for destroying chin manes of incoming players, so too does SNL seem to prey on facial fuzz heroes, mandating a shiny chin for the supposed honor to host their 'show'. Well, mission accomplished... not only have they destroyed yet another beardo hero, but they have ruined Christmas, a holiday usually full of beards and hairy cheer we love so much...

So, today we call for an outright BOYCOTT of SNL! Not until Jeff's beard grows back, but until they let a bearded brethren once again host and grace their stage with hairy fortitude. And perhaps moreover, until they admit their pogonophobic ways and REPENT! Until then, we are sorry to bring you the clip below, which was used as a promo for tonight's episode, showing His Dudeness taking a buzzer to his sweet sweet beard... it really tied the whole face together Jeff, you are out of your element!


FAIL!

Top 5 Beards at the Golden Globes

Before we jump into our round up, we'd like to point out one thing... there were undoubtedly more beards on a red carpet since the heyday of Hollywood or at least since last year's Beard and Mustache Championships... to us last night's awards event serves as just another example of the "Year of the Beard," we hate to tell i told you so... but we did, you know it.

The credit goes to Pop Candy and USA Today for making the first round up (their top 10 can be found here), for tackling this important ranking and helping us with the perspective on last night's facial fuzziness -- which Whitney Matheson called "last night's must-have accessory" -- and also to thefrisky.com for last year's round up (which can be found here).

Now that the accreditation formalities are out of the way, below are the winners and our top 5 (with a tie for 5th)... enjoy, and know that we know beards, so why argue...?

  1. William Hurt -- Best All Around
  2. Jon Hamm -- Best New Beard
  3. George Clooney -- Best Salt & Pepper
  4. Vincent Kartheiser -- Best Two-Tone
  5. Jeff Bridges/Robert Downey Jr -- Best Goatee(s)

1. This magnificent facial mane was surely used as a distraction from crap on his shoulder... success!

2. If you will it, they will come with an awesome beard... YES!

3. It's George... with a beard... what's not to love... it's GEORGE!

4. Well, whatever this is, we think we like it... probably have to, Mad Men and all...

T5. We just love both of you dudes... and unlike beards, goatees rule only as much as those they are attached to.