Zach Galifianakis

Zach Galifianakis: Stay True To Your Beard

"For 8 years now I've been addicted to cold turkey. When I tell people I'm quitting cold turkey, they say,"What are you quitting?"-- I'm fucking quitting cold turkey." - Zach Galifianakis
 
Remember back in March 2010, when BaB asked you to boycott Zach Galifianakis until he grew his beard back?  Well, we're reluctantly going back on the pro-Galifianakis bandwagon especially after we saw his bearded glory grace the cover of GQ where the magazine stated, "There's comedy gold in them thar hairs." (Obviously the outlet meant that "them thar hairs" give Zach the comedy power he needs to be awesome, but we'll let it slide).  

He returns to the big screen this May with The Hangover Part II, so it comes as no surprise that new readers of GQ are also offered a free messenger bag with thieir subscription next month (not joking).
“The world has never been more screwed up than it is right now. Except maybe during the wonder years. I think it all started with Fred Savage and that whole thing he did with Savage Garden… Technology is also overrated. It’s making our society less private. Like, I would advise people that while it’s okay to tweet about your paper-towel purchase, I really don’t want to know about what shape your stool is in.” - Zach G.
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Boycott SNL! Beards of the World... UNITE!

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Enough is enough... the beards are not to be messed with, and once pushed too far, we will come back thicker, darker and more rich with vigor (aka longer and uncut) than ever before! Billboards are one thing, but this 'shaving culture' that seems to be rearing it's ugly bald head during the last month of this year of our lord, the year of the beard, is disgusting... and feeding this shaved beast is ill advised, especially during Decembeard.

Our favorite goatee winner from last year's globes, THE dude, el Duderino himself (and the star of both “Tron: Legacy” and “True Grit”) will be hosting “Saturday Night Live” tonight... which was supposed to be a Christmas SNL to remember. Now it will be one we'll never forget... ever.

Our dear Jeff Bridges seems to have followed in the sad ways of Zach G. from last march, when the reTARD succumbed to corporate pressure and shaved during his hosting stint at SNL... well, we are calling BULLSHIT on this 'comedy show' that seems to be filled with writers seemingly unable (or worse yet, unwilling) to let their creative juices flow to write skits for furry faces... FOR SHAME we say.

Just like the dreaded NY Yankees are known for destroying chin manes of incoming players, so too does SNL seem to prey on facial fuzz heroes, mandating a shiny chin for the supposed honor to host their 'show'. Well, mission accomplished... not only have they destroyed yet another beardo hero, but they have ruined Christmas, a holiday usually full of beards and hairy cheer we love so much...

So, today we call for an outright BOYCOTT of SNL! Not until Jeff's beard grows back, but until they let a bearded brethren once again host and grace their stage with hairy fortitude. And perhaps moreover, until they admit their pogonophobic ways and REPENT! Until then, we are sorry to bring you the clip below, which was used as a promo for tonight's episode, showing His Dudeness taking a buzzer to his sweet sweet beard... it really tied the whole face together Jeff, you are out of your element!


FAIL!